A blog devoted to RANTS ON AUTOMOTIVE DESIGN, car reviews, and - above all - fugly autos. whether looking for vehicular plagiarism or rides of extreme tastelessness, you've come to the right place.
Monday, August 01, 2005
The Checklist
I've noticed that quite a few cars I've been posting lately follow what seem to be quidelines for modification. Few cars have all the modifications listed, but if there was one that had them all I'm sure that car's owner would be elevated to a god-like status. Only to be overthrown by the person who has all the said modifications but in a bigger and therefore better form.
The checklist is as follows:
1. Large, elongated chin spoiler / air dam up front.
2. Some sorta of widebody kit, preferably home made. Can consist of wheel well extentions and sill extentions as pictures, or in some sorta of blocky cardboard-esque bodykit.
3. Large an inappropriate rear spoiler. Can be either of the airfoil variety or ramp type. This modification allows for anything actually, as long as it is attached to the trunk and tall. Large sharks fins for example, or possibly a fish tail or even just a large upright box, would also apply here and be appropriate.
4. Headlamp covers, preferable covering only one lamp.
5. Intercooler mounted externally.
6. Miscellaneous stars, whether in vinyl or rendered in shapes in the bodykit itself.
7. Crooked headlights or taillights. Ultimately, one of the crooked headlights should have a cover (see 4).
8. Extended exhaust pipes. To include two items in one - bend the pipe into the shape of a star.
9. Hood extentions (part A): Hood scoops and/or vertical triangular pieces for optimal airflow.
10. Hood extentions (part B): Extending the hood and/or fenders forward.
11. Gaudy paint. Optimally two tone, with stars and stripes, and of two clashing colours.
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1 comment:
They're ALL gaudy!
They ALL make my EYES HURT!!!!
They ALL contain FoamCoreBoard and Magic Markers!!!
_Check
_Check and
_CHECK!!!
Itsa SCAMOTA!
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