Civic Disobedience

The latest generation of the Honda Civic has been controversial since it was born. Many of the fans of the hot-hatch were disappointed by it's wedgy and short front overhang, and thought it looked like a minivan. I felt this way at first, but I grew to like the car.

However, in trying to spark the interest of the current speed-racer crowd, they then updated the look with what I think are the most awkward looking projector beam headlights in the world. Sure they're brighter, but they're fugging hideous. And the new "Euro" tails aren't much to look at either. Why must all Japanese companies make some form of clear lense taillights? Some look ok, but most look cheap and ugly.

Domo Arigato, MRS Zagato

Usually, Italian automotive design firms make beautiful cars. Even when modifying currently existing models. Zagato is famous for it's Zagato bodied Aston Martins for the past 40 or so years.

However a couple years ago they decided to rebody the slightly homely/boring Toyota MRS/MR2, and this is what they came out with. It sorta looks like a squashed spider or flounder. The rear end doesn't look quite as fugly, although it does sorta have a 1950's Americana feel too it.

Trabant Limo - Luxury at it's fugliest

A custom limo Trabant, of which there are many. Some are obviously a mockery of the car, much like the Yugos you see transformed into telephones and such.

However, this nuclear green version seems to be an honest attempt at a limo. Some fugly details are the numerous different windows, the 3 axles, and it's super luxerious back seat, which appears to be a mix of taxicab and 1970's furniture. Note the light fixtures.

Trabant Tramp - enough said

Behold - the Trabant Tramp. This has been yet the most hilarious automotive name yet to come across. Other than possibly the Gaylord.

Basically, the Tramp was a convertible Jeep style version of the Trabant - derived from a military use version.

East German Fug - Trabant

Ahhhh Trabant. Famous for it's smoke belching 2 stoke engines and Beetle rivalling longevity. And it's toy-like, plastic bodied fugliness. However, it has a cult following as it's easy to fix and can last for decades. But then so can lawn mowers.

Although many people familiar with the Trabant don't know it, Trabant is actually the model name. Sachsenring is the company that produces the Trabant.

The car we know as the Trabant was born in 1957. It was officially called the Trabant P50 (top pic) and featured a 500cc twin cylinder two stroke engine, which used forced air cooling like VW's Beetle. The car was built using an inner shell and floor pan made of steel. The engine, transmision, steering and front suspension were mounted on a detachable sub frame. The outer body panels were all made of Duraplast plastic. This resulted in a compact, simple, economical, car that could seat four adults. The P50 was available in saloon, estate, and van formats and volume production started in 1957. At this time the Trabant P50, the P70, and P240 were all in production at the Sachsenring factory alongside of trucks. The P60 came after, and it was basically the same car with a larger 600cc engine.

In 1964 the Trabant had a major redesign which resulted in the launch of the P601 - the car most know and love (second and third pics). This car retained the same basic concept, and the new body style provided more interior and luggage space, as well as the plain egg crate grille upfront. Particularly fugly examples had the grille, bumpers, and light surrounds painted black.

The P601 body style was the last major styling revision until the end of production in 1991. This lead many people to believe that the cars stayed the same and no further development took place. In reality the cars were constantly developed and every year saw the introduction of a number of changes. The power output of the engine gradually increased, and modifications to the engine allowed it to run with much less oil mixed with the petrol. The brakes were improved, and electrics upgrades were made. With the basic core staying the same, many older Trabants were carefully recycled by being rebuilt and updated with later components which ads to the car's longevity and easy of maintenance.

In 1988 an agreement was entered with VW to produce Polo engines which were fitted to a much modified version of the P601 usually refered to as the 1.1 (most visible was the new grille and taillights - bottom 2 pics). This was initially produced in parallel with the two stroke car. Eventually, after the fall of the Berlin wall the production of the two stroke car was phased out.

Custom Civic Fug

Found this on E-Bay. First off I have to say I really appreciate and respect the work that goes into each and every car to be transformed according to their owners vision.

Sadly, most cars in the "ricer" scene are not my cup of tea. For me, a car is to be driven, not to show off in cars shows. Or to burst ear drums. Or to play PS2 in.

This particular car wouldn't be all that bad exept for two things - the seizure inducing rainbow paint job, and those god awful clear lense "Euro/Altezza" taillights. They're - like - so 1999.

Bristol Blenheim 3

Believe it or not, this car is brand new. And unbelievably expensive.

40 or so years ago, Bristol was a well respected British marque. Yet over the years the brand has deminished in all but price to the model you see here. Basically, it's aiming for the Rolls-Royce / Bentley market, but with an ugly, inelegant car that has ancient technology and mediocre build quality.

The look definetly doesn't suggest the price one pays. For a base price of £139,825 ($248,425 USD), you can get a Bristol Blenhiem 3 as pictured here, looking like a huge vintage 1970s Ford Capri with an updated rear fascia. This updating of an old body recalls many Russian cars, which aren't as expensive. This may not have been a bad thing if the car looked expensive, but it doesn't. It looks like a bread-and-butter sedan from 30 years ago. Even worse, you can order different packages and get the price up to £152,456 ($270,953 USD).

It's actually confusing to think about how the company still survives. They must solely rely on the few old, rich Brits who remember the old days. To be fair, there is a new Bristol sports car out called the Fighter - and while it looks pretty, it's mechanics (other than the borrowed Viper V10 engine) and build are still pretty sketchy, and it costs even more.

I recently read on www.thetruthaboutcars.com a very rare review on the Blenheim, thanks to a disatified owner. The following is an exert from the review:

"Bristol is one of Britain’s most venerated carmakers. For over thirty-five years, Brits “in the know” have considered the obscure automaker’s products to be the embodiment of English hand built quality and understated exclusivity. Unfortunately, motoring journalists need not apply. In fact, Bristol actively discourages any sort of publicity for its current cars.

Luckily, one brave Blenheim owner decided to lend his car for a review. “What are the two things that can be seen from outer space?” the owner asked rhetorically. “The Great Wall of China and the panel gaps of a Bristol.” True enough, despite the fact that this particular Blenheim had recently enjoyed a body-off restoration-- to eliminate rot. Which was discovered after the car’s paint had cracked (necessitating a total re-spray). Whereupon the owner’s mechanics addressed a veritable laundry list of mechanical ailments: inoperative air conditioning, “inappropriate” shock absorbers, a failed exhaust system, two blown window motors, axle whine, insufficient engine cooling and more.

This tragic tale of mechanical malfeasance was easily eclipsed by the horror lurking inside the Blenheim’s cabin. To call the combination of wood, cheap rocker switches, tiny mirror controls, gigantic air conditioner, fiddly Japanese stereo and seemingly random assortment of switches, buttons and knobs “unattractive” would be like calling a drag racer “quick off the mark”. The Blenheim’s interior is such a hideous concoction of styles and textures the snooty millionaire mentioned above felt compelled to redesign and rewire the entire dash.

Once underway, the much-repaired Blenheim handled better than you’d expect-- for a car whose chassis dates back to 1946. At the time, it must have been a revelation. By today’s standards, Group A rental cars offer better ride and road-holding. As for power, the 5.9-liter V8 felt decidedly reluctant. When I asked if the odd sound under throttle indicated some kind of problem, the owner told me to drop the subject.

The Bristol Blenheim offered insufferable build quality, questionable reliability and appalling aesthetics. Yet it cost twice as much as a top-of-the-line Mercedes, BMW or Porsche. The only possible justification for buying a Blenheim lies in its rarity and its connection with Bristol’s famous heritage. For some wealthy owners, a handful, it is enough."

AMC Pacer - Pug Fugly

In the 70’s, AMC’s new way of thinking was the "AMC Philosophy of Difference". From this emerged a car that has come to be one of the largest automotive jokes around. Not that the car was a huge mechanical failure - it was just that it’s odd (or cute to some people) fugliness has gained it a reputation for being the car of losers, geeks and nerds since it’s inception.

It was apparently designed by placing four people in seats and designing the car around them to best accommodate their comfort and safety. This created a car that was only 100 inches long, but 80 inches wide. Theoretically this was the same concept that produced the Gremlin - a large car chassis shortened make and short but wide car. However, the Pacer’s body was refined in a wind tunnel to give it superior aerodynamics. But this happened to make it look like less of a half car like the Gremlin, but a gumdrop.

Other odd features: the passenger door was 4" longer than the driver's to let back seat passengers in more easily. Ford’s Windstar later adopted this idea, but the asymmetrical doors are more noticeable on this small, fishbowl like car. Engine choices were the same "fuel efficient" V6s of the Gremlin.

In 1977, a longer wheelbase wagon version of the Gremlin was added, which managed to look a little more awkward. Instead of a gumdrop it looked a little more like a time release pill. Sales were beginning to disappoint, and it was certain that AMC would not make the money off the Pacer to cover the tooling costs of creating it. Sales got lower every year since it’s introduction, and the wagon was an easy way of trying to create more sales.

Another last ditch effort was to transplant the 5.0L V8 from the Gremlin into the Pacer after people wishing for more power. However, it wouldn’t fit under the sleek hood of the Pacer. A new hood was made with a bulge for the V8, and front end styling was revised with a strange finicky grille with a pattern that mimicked that of Mercedes Benz’s of the era.

Production started in 1975 and 1980 was the final year of sale (although technically they were just 1979 models that weren’t sold in that model year). Although machincally and theoretically similar to the Gremlin, the Pacer had not nearly the fans or sales of it’s brother. Oddly enough - although they were claimed to be two difference cars, these engine/chassis/concept sharers also shared the "X" package, which offered similar stripe and rim packages.

As a last comment, I would like to refer to the posted (French) vintage advertisement of the Pacer. I love how the feces brown Pacer looks like it was just crapped out by the shocked and embarassed model. Either that or the pug fugly Pacer is humping her leg. Or that the Pacer just plain looks like a$$.

AMC Eagle Spirit Kammback

Due to inexplicable demand, the Gremlin bodystyle was brought back to life with the new generation of AMC Eagle/Concord bodies. Technically an evolution of the Gremlin anyway, the fastback Eagle Spirit liftback was modifed into the Spirit Kammback, which basically looked like the Spirit with a Gremlin back end tacked on. The Eagle/Concord front looked slightly better than the Gremlin but it's higher, chunky shape made the Kammback body look even more chopped off, although the rear quarter windows were larger.

Worse yet, it was available in 4 wheel drive, and looked even more awkward with the extra ground clearance.

AMC Gremlin

The name of this car is sufficient to describe it's fugliness.

The AMC Gremlin was introduced in early 1970 as a 1970-1/2 model. It was the result of a fast track program to bring the first modern, U.S.-built subcompact car to market. AMC was successful in beating both GM and Ford to the punch, since the Chevrolet Vega and Ford Pinto were introduced as 1971 models. However in doing this they cut corners which were the downfall of the car and it's semi-successor, the Pacer.

By 1970, AMC had become a car company that was trying to be all things to all people, instead of concentrating on the economy end of the market as had been done successfully during the late 1950s and early '60s. The trouble was, AMC was the smallest of the U.S. auto companies and could least afford the tremendous costs associated with developing new vehicles.

Perhaps the most significant car in AMC's 1970 line-up was the Hornet , which was basically a replacement for the successful Rambler American series. In many respects, the Hornet was a very up-to-date car, even though it used a number of mechanical pieces from the Rambler.

The Hornet would be the basis for several AMC vehicles through the years, including the Concord and the all-wheel-drive Eagle which carried the company through the 80's to it's death which may be featured later for their own brand of fugliness.

Within six months of its own introduction, the Hornet had already spawned the Gremlin - evidence that in order to beat Ford and Chev they may have sacrificed too much in means of development time and thinking. AMC's "distinctively-styled" subcompact's basic design was penned on the back of a Northwest Orient air sickness bag (appropriately enough) only about 18 months before the car was introduced.

The late designer, Richard Teague was responsible for the design. The end product combined many of the rear-end styling features of the 1967 AMX/GT show car with the more mundane front end hardware of the production Hornet. The result of these two styles created it's controversial looking rear end - it looks as if someone cut off the back of the car with a cleaver. Only accentuating this was smaller rear quarter windows, which must have made backing up fun.

There were two basic Gremlin models offered for 1970: a bare-bones, fixed window two-seater (targeted as an import-fighting price leader) and a four-seater, which added a flip-up rear window hatch. One of the Gremlin's major selling points was its powertrain. While the rest of the subcompact competition had to make do with four-cylinder motivation, the first year Gremlin came equipped with either of two in-line, six-cylinder engines: a 128 horsepower 199 cubic inch (3.3L) engine was standard, while a 145 horsepower, 232 (3.8L) cubic inch version was optional. The same engines offered in - shock - the Hornet.

Because of the extra cubes and torque provided by the large six-cylinder engines, Gremlin's performance was quite sprightly, especially in comparison with the rest of the subcompact competition. However, this made the car a bit of an oxymoron. This was meant to be a compact car which was born because of the oil crisis and Asian competition. Cutting the rear end off a large car to make a smaller (but still wide) one and using the same big engines does not a economy car make. To make matters worse (or better for the power hungry) the smaller engine was dropped in 1971.

Another thing that added to the Gremlin's "unique" look was the X package offered for the first time in 1971. This package consisted of special "spear" striping on the body sides, body color grille surround, larger 14" blackwall tires mounted on slotted alloy wheels (raised white letter tires were optional), space-saver spare tire, custom interior trim including bucket seats, "engine turned" instrument trim, and special "X" decals. The rear deck inset panel containing the taillights received a full width decal (same colour as the striping) as part of the "X" package.

'72 saw a V8 option for the "economy" car - a 304 cubic inch unit that made 150hp. '73 saw more changes to the exterior to comply with safety laws adding large and uglier bumpers. A "Levi's" edition was also added, which added classy demin seats and other demin interior accents. Although most of the changes made the car look worse and worse (like the larger taillights) the last front end was a slight emprovement. Last year of production was 1978, which oddly allowed a three year overlap of AMC dealerships offering both this and the Pacer.


Above information was found on allpar.com, and editted by myself for length and content.